Two Schmieding-Trained Brothers Provide Care for Mother, Each Other

By Ben Boulden

When their mother, Willie Mae Skipper, began showing symptoms of vascular dementia at her home in Clarksdale, Miss., J.C. Skipper moved her to his home in Little Rock and began taking care of her there. For some time, he was able to look after her, but then he began to develop health problems.

J.C. needed support and back up as a caregiver. Just as he had made sacrifices for his mother, his brother Ronald stepped up to help. It’s what brothers do for each other.

Schmieding 3

A Schmieding instructor, with a patient manikin in the bed, talks to a students about the types of equipment that can make caregiving easier for the patient and the caregiver.

Ronald gave up a job as a manufacturing manager supervising 150 people at a Chicago food plant to move to Little Rock three years ago to help J.C. He had never lived in Little Rock, but he was willing to make the move for his family. It was a good thing he did because J.C.’s health continued to worsen.

Earlier this year, he began helping J.C.’s wife take care of his brother after J.C. had an aortal valve replaced and began experiencing kidney failure that requires dialysis.

Ronald Skipper paused when asked which was more stressful, supervising 150 people or taking care of two family members.

“That’s a toss-up, I guess,” he chuckled. “I get more pleasure out of taking care of mom and my brother.”

Nevertheless, even when J.C. was able to help more with Willie Mae’s care, both brothers sometimes found themselves lost in trying to cope with their mother’s dementia and related behavior. Eventually, Ronald discovered the Schmieding Home Caregiver Training Program.

In 2013 through the program, both Ronald and J.C. Skipper took a class on coping with dementia as a caregiver.

The Schmieding program educates individuals to care for older adults in the home, whether they are family caregivers or paid caregivers. In eight cities across Arkansas, the Schmieding program provides training classes, including at the UAMS main campus in Little Rock.

About 44 million Americans provide 37 billion hours of unpaid, informal care annually for adult family members and friends with chronic illnesses that prevent them from handling daily activities, according to the Family Caregiver Alliance.

The Skipper brothers wanted to be more effective in the hours of care they provided for their mother, now 92, and in a late stage of vascular dementia. She had cared for them when they were younger, and now they were caring for her. They wanted to understand what she was experiencing and get it right.

“We learned how to be patient with my mom, especially as she goes through things like sundowning,” Ronald Skipper said. “I also learned how to move her around in bed and lift her up with the gate belt. There were so many things I learned. It was a very interesting course.”

Sundowning is a psychological state associated with confusion and restlessness patients with dementia experience, usually in the evening, or when the sun goes down.

Schmieding instructors helped the brothers to better understand that much of their mother’s behavior was a result of the dementia and not willful.

“It helped in dealing with the anger and personality changes that happen with my mom and her dementia,” said Ronald.

Without having that knowledge and the skills they acquired in the course, much of what they did would have been determined by trial and error, Ronald said. Now, they had the peace of mind that comes with training and education and that guesswork couldn’t provide.

Almost as importantly, their Schmieding program experience helped diminish some feelings of isolation.

“The course opened my eyes to a lot of things, especially hearing in the group setting about other people’s experiences and what they have gone through,” Ronald Skipper said. “It was very enlightening.”

He also was introduced to online sources of information and encouraged by the program to continue his self-education about dementia and caregiving after the course was over.

Almost every night before going to sleep, he said he reads an article or two about dementia or caregiving.

Ronald’s schedule is as unpredictable as his mother’s needs. Still, for family, he gives his time and energy to ensuring those needs, and those of his brother, are met. Schmieding has given him the practical knowledge to confidently take on the role of caregiver in his family.

“Without a doubt I would recommend Schmieding to other caregivers because prior to taking that course, I really had no idea as to what vascular dementia was all about,” said Ronald Skipper. “You hear about it, but you don’t know.”